Joke of the week: Discharging hospital patients

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Discharging hospital patients:

In a hospital, the regulations required a wheelchair for patients being discharged.

One man, while working as a student nurse, found an elderly gentleman already dressed and sitting on the bed with a suitcase at his feet, insisting that he didn’t need any help to leave the


After a chat about rules being rules, he reluctantly agreed to being wheeled to the elevator. On the way down, the nurse asked him if his wife was meeting him.

“I don’t know,” he said. “She’s still upstairs in the bathroom, changing out of her hospital gown.”

The clever child:

A young boy enters a barber shop and the barber whispers to his customer, “This is the dumbest kid in the world. Watch while I prove it to you.”

The barber puts a dollar bill in one hand and two quarters in the other, then calls the boy over and asks, “Which do you want?”

The boy takes the quarters and leaves.

“What did I tell you?” said the barber. “That kid never learns!”

Later, when the customer leaves, he sees the same young boy coming out of the ice cream store. “Hey! May I ask you a question? Why did you take the quarters instead of the dollar bill?”

The boy licked his cone and replied, “Because the day I take the dollar, the game is over.”

Getting older:

An elderly lady did her shopping and upon return found four men in her car. She immediately dropped her shopping bags and began to hit them with her heavy handbag, proceeding to scream at them at the top of her voice, commanding them to get out of the car.

The men didn’t wait around for a second invitation but got out and ran like mad. The lady proceeded to load her shopping bags into the back of the car and got into the driver’s seat.

Small problem, her key wouldn’t fit the ignition.

Her actual car was identical and parked four/five spaces further down. She realized her mistake, loaded her bags into her car and drove to the police station.

The officer that she told the story to nearly tore himself in two with laughter and pointed to the other end of the counter where four pale males were reporting a car-jacking by a mad elderly woman.

No charges were filed.

Submitted by Ajendra Goli

Reveshni Moodley

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